Yup! That's about when it started with my son, Owen! It hasn't really stopped, yet, but it has slowed-down a bit. It annoys the hell outta me, and I even find myself whining back. It does end, so I have been told!
I am in Solidarity with you, Rori!

hi there,
i'm new here, glad to be here. my 4 year old (liam) whines often and i've discovered that a lot of his whining has to do with his new baby brother (Rowan). I've noticed it especially around dressing himself, sometimes eating or in general just things that he can really do fine by himself. I just play into it (get him dressed) if I can at that moment and encourage him to help me do it. To help keep my own sanity, I think- "he' only four and this is probably a phase with him" and I try not to get really angry at him about it because that only seems to make it worse. I tend to think that kids might use this sort of behaviour when they are dealing with developmental stresses. Its kind of a back and forth with kids as they strive towards independence, one step forward, then two backward for a while then they move forward again. I've noticed the same pattern with toileting and cleaning himself. Some days he'll do it all himself (pull his pant down, sit down etc...) and then some days its " I need help, no, I don't know how etc...". Anyways, just some thoughts.

Well my daughters only 21 months so no major whining yet. Although sometime she does kind of cry and whine sometimes when she wants something. I always tell her to "Please use your words." This usually works.

Also options are working great for us "I can help you do it, or you can do it yourself."

I agree with not responding to the whining - saying things (calmly) such as "I can't understand you when you speak in that voice, please use use a normal tone of voice" or "Whining never works for getting what you want, maybe next time you can try something different."

Whatever you do I hope it works. I am an art teacher at an elementary school and one of my fourth grade boys only knows how to communicate through whining. It doesn't matter what he is asking or talking about, it is ALWAYS in a whine. And he has been that way since I have been teaching there (almost three years) I believe it is because his parents encourage this behavior in some way. It is the most annoying behavior I can possibly think of. It's worse than the thought of nails running down a chalk board. I have tried everything with this child and nothing works. Of course I only see him and hour or so a week. Hopefully for him it stops before he gets to middle school where he will be eaten alive for that behavior.

So I can certainly sympathize and good luck!

This sounds harsh but it has always worked like a charm with every whiny kid I know (and I have a HUGE family full of whiners)
NEVER GIVE IN TO A WHINE UNLESS THEY ARE IN GENUINE PAIN, ever. No Matter how painful or inconvenient it is to you.
The System:
1. sit the child down and explain that whining doesn't get you anything and give examples that the child understands and ask them to give examples. Work with the child on ways to communicate effectively and remind them you are in charge so "I dont wannnaaaa do it!" won't ever work.
2. explain that if you want something you have to ask nicely, get it, do it, whatever and have the child explain this back to you and give examples.
3. Give a TON of positive reinforcement - you have to be really on top of giving the child what they need before they resort to whining so they learn that asking works waaaaay better and gets approval.
4. NEVER give in to whining unless the child is in pain no matter how much it bugs you. This is the hardest part because a habitual whiner has learned that if they whine long enough and loud enough it will get them what they want. So at first they will try to outlast you since whining is comfortable to them. They have to learn that asking works much better (see #3)
5. If they are whining because they are hurt and you give in explain that whining is appropriate right now because they are in pain (physical or emotional) this way they learn when whining is ok.

I developed this system as the youngest of a blended family of 10 kids (AKA free babysitter) It worked with all of my nieces and nephews and now I use it with the special and high risk kids I work with every day. Many times, because of this system, parents wonder why their kid whines at home but not with me.

try it! And remember positive reinforcement and never give in to it no matter what!

good luck!

I used to watch my friends kids. Her older daughter ALWAYS did that. Particularly the I can't do it or its too hard. Her mom played into it. I think in her case, she is the oldest of 4 and just wanted a lil babying like everyone else. HOWEVER- it would drive me crazy and I had 6 kids at the time (counting hers) and didn't have time for that so I would just say 'fine you don't go then". After about a week of that , no more whining. Not with me anyway, she still does it with mom.